As you all know, I've been away from the family for quite some time now. If I were single this might be easier but its not easy being away for months at a time... as others in the family know all too well already. I just found out yesterday that it might even be longer than the end of March (like I thought) before I get to head home. Here's why...
If you didn't read Katie's blog I'll fill ya in. Last weekend I got really sick (its normal out here with the standard of living). I had just left dinner and went to the store with some friends and when I got there I felt like a sponge that was still balled up tight getting the water wrung out of me. A pretty chilly wind didn't help matters much. I got that deep and dull ache in my bones feeling and decided to hurry home. The rest of that evening had me shivering up a storm. I had a bad case of the chills and slept in my sleeping bag wearing socks, sweat bottom and top, and my PT felt cap. I woke up a bit sweaty, as expected, but felt like I was doing 100 times better than how I felt the night before.
I ended up getting up and getting ready for formation that morning expecting to enjoy another day of my weekend. Not so. About 5-10 minutes into formation I felt my blood pressure shoot through the roof and grabbed hold of my buddy's coat sleeve in front of me. I managed to make it through that syncopal (fainting) episode where my vision went fuzzy and then completely dark for a few seconds but realized that my body wasn't in as good of shape as I had predicted earlier. Here's what I was told happened next... I felt the pressure rise again and I grabbed hold of the coat sleeve in front of me. A friend of mine who was watching said that my eyes just rolled into the back of my head after that, my body just locked up and I passed out. I managed to get caught on the way down (unlike my last episode like this my freshman year of highschool) and came to about 10 or so seconds later. I was told while I was passed out that I started asking questions like "What happened?" and "Where am I?" and "Is everything alright?". When I came to the sergeant on duty was leaning over me and asked if I was alright and if I'd been drinking. I told him I felt pretty sick (you usually do after coming to from a fainting spell) and told him I don't drink. I stood up and thought I'd be fine until I had a couple buddies grab a hold of me and lead me to the back of the formation and sit me down because I looked like I might try pulling that stunt again.
Due to that incident I ended up going to the ER and hanging out there for most of the day while I got checked on. During that time I slept uncomfortably as I tried to find a comfortable sitting position in the bed that wasn't putting all my weight on my lower back. They checked me for influenza and ran a few tests/labs on me. Lets just say some labs were pretty invasive and I hope I don't have to go through that again anytime soon. I got released later Sunday afternoon (I was received early Sunday morning at the ER) after being their guinea pig for about 7 hours or so. Turns out I didn't have influenza but was told I had some nasty virus going around. I was given my medicine and told all I could do was ride it out. Little did I know what kind of affect that would have on me once I got back to the company. Oh yeah... while I was there they noticed the subtle murmur in my heart and some oddities on my EKG too. They got me set up for a cardio appointment that is currently set for Feb. 23.
I went to the clinic the next morning for sick call and was issued a profile that prevented me from doing anything until I was checked out from the cardio appt. I've enjoyed the last few days of not having to do PT and letting my body slowly get better.
So far so good, right? Wrong. Yesterday was my first day of the Whiskey side of training for me. I have only a few short weeks on this side and then I'm done. My instructors asked if anyone had any profiles and I handed mine in. Shortly after lunch I was taken aside to talk to the Senior Instructor of our classes. Due to the stressful environments I'll be introduced to on this side of training I was told that I would now be a medical holdover. What that means is that I currently cannot participate in class and just hang around the company area until I've been seen for my appointment with cardio. Thats currently 3 weeks away and will end up sending me to another company when I'm cleared. That means I'll be away from family for quite a bit longer than we thought I would be and its eating me up inside. I don't want to wait any longer to finish my training and make it back home to my sweet family.
With that said, there is a chance that my sergeant is going to try to up my appointment to as soon as possible... Monday if I'm lucky. Cardio will do the same thing to me that the civilian side did to me before Salt Lake County allowed me to be hired on with them. They are concerned with my health... which I know there is nothing wrong with me since I've had this slight irregular pulse (due to my little murmur) for as long as I can remember. I don't know what to do about it except hope that I can get it taken care of quickly and move on with training. I don't care to be here for who knows how long while the Army takes its sweet time checking me out and deciding on what they want to do with me. I'll keep you posted as to what happens and any changes that take place but all I ask is that you keep me in your thoughts and prayers (Katie and Caleb too) and that things will work out the way that they should and that we'll be able to handle whatever situation arises from this.
Just when I think I see the light at the end of the tunnel I have an obstacle set in front of me. I hope I can deal with it rationally and see it for the obstacle it is and know that I will eventually get back home to be with my family... just not as quickly as I had hoped after these last few long months have kept me away from them. I also hope that Katie will be able to manage that much longer with me gone and we'll get through this intact.
As we've both said to each other before... this time and distance sure has made our hearts grow fonder. Now its time for my heart to grow stronger as I prepare myself to overcome this unforseen obstacle.
Anencephaly
11 years ago
4 comments:
Neal - I'm so sorry. If they can't get you in on Monday, ask if there's an available cardio appointment in Hawaii :)
We'll be praying for you.
I understand your frustration... Really I do. I understand the stress and worries that come with such a big unkown future that you can't control. Who knows what will come or not because of this event. I do know that, even though the process moves at it's own inconvenient pace, but it is in your best interest do be fully capable of what's to come. Just lack you can develops a sudden allergy to something you have eaten your whole life... Your previously minor medical issue can become serious with no warning at all. Its hard to think of even a day longer away, than what you expected. But, don't forget how far you've come and all that is already behind you. Remember when we talked about how this is more a battle of witts than anything else. Just don't let it distract or discourage you from all that motivates you to be where you are today. Accept your current situation, and by planning your next three moves is how you are garunteed to come out on top. Love you man.
sorry to hear of the pending delay. so goes the army life...hurry up and wait, right? you'll be in our thoughts and prayers...we love you!
Neal, I hope things get moved up. That must be terrible having to wait for your appointment. I'll keep you in my prayers this week!
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